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Girls, So Confusing: Navigating Female Friendships

By:  Lauren Napierkowski

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In a sea of neon lime green that’s been all over our socials this past week, Charli XCX and Lorde have officially worked out their beef. Watching the clipped TikTok videos from the Sweat Tour’s stop at Madison Square Garden shook me to my core. Charli was in her 365-party-girl element, captivating the audience with pulsating beats from her latest album, Brat, when a plot-twist worthy of a rom-com unfolded: she brought out Lorde. Cue the gasps! Their reunion was a monumental moment in pop culture, worthy of every major news outlet’s attention, and it got me thinking: why are female friendships so confusing?


Girlfriends and It’s the Same But There’s Drama So it’s Not


You see, the minute you think you’ve nailed down the vibes of a friendship, life hands you a plot twist. One moment, you’re sharing snacks and secrets after a late night out at 2 a.m.; the next, you’re exchanging dry replies over a misunderstood text. It’s like trying to follow a complicated TikTok dance - one wrong move, and you’re left flailing, feeling utterly confused.


Take Charli and Lorde, for instance. Their friendship had its fair share of ups and downs, stemming from personal battles they faced in private. But they managed to have worked it out - both on the Girl, so confusing remix and in real time. Isn’t it interesting how sometimes the best reconcilings often emerge from the messiest emotions? Their collaboration was a celebration of growth and understanding - a sentiment many of us can relate to when we reflect on our friendships.


So, how do we navigate this wild ride of estrogen and emotions? Here are a few takeaways I’ve picked up along the way (and trust me, I’ve seen my fair share of girl drama):


Communicate Openly: You know that feeling when you send a voice memo that’s basically a TED talk, and your friend just replies with “LOL”? If something’s bothering you, be honest about it. Don’t let resentment fester like that pile of laundry you keep meaning to wash. 


Embrace the Imperfection: Friendships aren’t meant to be perfect. We all have those “What the hell just happened?” moments. It’s totally normal to overthink things after a miscommunication or disagree on plans. In those moments, we learn more about ourselves and each other. 


Celebrate Growth: As the years go by, we change faster than the latest fashion trends - and so do our friendships. Some relationships evolve into something deeper, while others might fizzle out like that one trend you regret (hello chevron!) It’s ok to let go of friendships that no longer fit your energy. Hold tight to the friendships that uplift you - those are your real MVPs.


Vibe Attracts Tribe: Surround yourself with people who get your lore. As the saying goes, you are who you hang around. Sometimes you need to let go of unstable dynamics and gravitate towards those who inspire you to be the best version of yourself. Seek friendships that feel like home, not a house of mirrors.


Reconcile Like a Pro: If there’s a friendship worth saving, don’t ghost like you would from a mindless hookup. Life is too short for petty behavior. Sometimes, all it takes is one heartfelt convo and maybe a little shared laughter to mend those broken ties.


Girl, Make Amends


In the end, female friendships are as complex and beautiful as the women who share them. Charli and Lorde coming back together can remind us that even through the comfort and chaos of those sisterly bonds, there’s always room for making up.


So, to all the girls out there navigating the twists and turns of friendship: embrace the madness, communicate like it’s no big deal, and remember that sometimes the most complex situations can lead to the sweetest reunions. And just like the lyrics of “Girl, So Confusing,” maybe we can all learn to celebrate the confusion together. Because in the end, while girls may be so confusing, that’s precisely what makes our lives so exciting!


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